Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged.
On discharge day, a young orderly found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet. He insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital. He had walked in, he could walk our just fine.
After an adamant chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let the orderly wheel him to the elevator.
On the way down the orderly asked him if his wife was meeting him downstairs.
"I doubt that," the old man said, "you've just given her a hip replacement, and she's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."