Three mice are in a bar. The first mouse takes a swig of his beer and says, "I'm the baddest mouse. In my neighborhood, we have these big mouse traps. I'm so tough that I walk up to them, grab the cheese, catch the bar and press it up and down with one arm while I eat the cheese."
The second mouse takes a couple swigs of his beer and says, "That's nothin'. In my neighborhood we have that rat-poison stuff, and I grab it, throw it in my water and gargle it. It ain't nothin'. I'm the baddest mouse."
The third mouse slams his beer, gets up and starts walking away. The other two look at him and say, "Where are you going?"
The third mouse looks at the other two and says, "You two have fun. I'm heading out to my weekly poker game with the local alley cats."